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October 11, 2005

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No matter what we do
from the crib until the end
We are writing
the history of our life.

Each night we write a paragraph,
Each month we finish a page,
Each year we close a chapter,
and not a word is forgotten
of the desires of our heart...

Each morning as we wake up
the book opens to a new and clean page.
Each thought, each word, each act,
are written in the book each night.

God let us write our stories
We are the authors of our lives.

Never a word will be erased
never will the book reach an end
Until the time when we write
The End.

Then God will take the book
read it with much enthusiam

He will be surprised,
He will laugh and also cry,
of the things we have written.

He will be so proud
in seeing what we have lived...

So see that what you do
is worth of God to read
Do live a life that is full
the way that Jesus did...
Author Unknown

This is my life.  Years have passed since I started this journal of mine. Today is a celebration of my life as I know it now.  It was four years ago today that I started this way of life.
I remember when I first started I wondered if I would be successful, wondered if I was successful, if it would last.  I remember promising myself I would NEVER lose focus.  That I now had the tools and I know how to use them.
 It took a day short of a year to lose the weight, that in retrospect was the easy part of this new way of life.  The last three years I have struggled with maintaining my weight...give or take twenty pounds...depending on the time of year.
I still have not come to terms with the struggle, I hate the fact that I do struggle... that if I let my guard down...that fat monster is hiding behind the corner waiting...
I have learned alot these past three years... my toughest time to lose focus is the summer Ed and I take five weeks off together and enjoy are lake house...there is not a gym close by and every summer it seems I decrease my resistant training from five days a week to maybe once or twice...although I walk most days.  The fall finds me back on track and trying to get off what I have put on over the summer and before the holidays... then the dead of winter arrives, holidays are over and I am again back on track until we take our tropical vacation (this year we are going to Jamaica) The spring arrives and it is my best season.  I seem focused renewed and get the weight off before the summer arrives.  Tis a viscious cycle...or is it just my journey? As I live this way, every year that goes by is yet another chapter...and within reach always is the desires of my be fit and healthy.